Today's thoughts

Kate is now a week old, really one week and one day. Everyday is a challenge for me, because this is all so new to me. I am often surprised at some of the things my little girl does. I swear she smiles even though they say she is too little. She loves to be held, especially when she wants to sleep. I have found that she loves to lay in the middle of my chest with her ear towards me (probably to listen to my heart beat, since it was a constant sound for her before she was born). If Kraig tries to lay her on his chest, she squirms. She has been trying to lift her head, since the day she was born, she has already head butt Kraig a couple of times. Kraig thinks her head butting him is great, especially since he wants to put her in kick boxing and Jiu Jitsu when she is old enough. She also seems very alert all the time, and has since she was born. We need to take her to a specialist for craniosynostosis. Kraig has it, and her head was oddly shaped when she came out, so they think she may have it, I am praying she doesn't need surgery. There are times I swear she is gasping for breath, it always scares me. I have found her with her left arm sticking straight in the air while she is sleeping a few times, I think it is kind of funny. She loves binky's, she doesn't really care what kind either. I don't let her sleep with a binky though, I am worried about something happening. She is currently sleeping on my bed next to me, I swear some how she moved from where I put her, she is closer to me then I thought she had been. Does that mean she is going to start rolling over early? Sometimes she squeaks in her sleep, we have for now nicknamed her Squeakers. We took her to the pediatrician's yesterday, I forgot her bottle and her binky, and she was so very mad. I felt so bad. I was trying not to cry. Are my emotions going to go back to normal anytime soon? I am seriously wondering what color her eyes are going to be, Kraig thinks blue. I guess we will see.
Things have been a little frustrating for me during the last week. Everything has changed, I don't know what normal life will be like for a while, but I do know it won't be what it was before. I just hope that I can do this without totally messing it up.
Also I watched a video that made me cry. This lady is incredible, here is the video (sorry the edge gets cut off, that is the smallest size they have)